BlOGANUARY 23, 2022: Interview a fictional character.

I’d like to share an interview with the Green M&M, a spokescandy for the popular “m” stamped candy-coated little kernel of “chocolate that melts in your mouth- not in your hand.”

Formerly known as Miss Green, now known as Green, has kindly accepted our invitation to talk about the recent changes in branding and the pivoting of the company as represented by the colored candies that we all know. We took some questions from our audience and would like to thank you for all of your submissions.

Please keep in mind that this post does not necessarily reflect the M&M Mars company, the author of the interview, website, or supportive affiliations. This is just a response to a writing prompt and creative writing exercise, focusing on character development and dialogue.

Interviewer: Chocolate is My Friend.

Interviewee: Green M&M.

Interview Setting: The interview was conducted in response to today’s daily prompt, our writing challenge for Bloganuary. The interview was conducted at 07:30 AM EST on a beautiful, cloudless Sunday morning. 

Affiliation with Interviewee: I have consumed quite a bit of M&M’s throughout my lifetime. I’m especially partial to the peanut butter ones.

I also enjoy making sugar cookies with 4 M&M’s baked into the tops.

You can check out my recipe for Mint Dark Chocolate M&M St. Patrick’s Day Sugar Cookies here.

(Start of Interview)

Chocolate is My Friend: Let’s begin. Green, first I’d like to thank you for coming here today and taking the time out of your busy schedule to join us for an interview. It’s great to see how you traveled so easily from my snack cupboard and into my hand.

Green: I’m happy to be here. It’s my absolute pleasure.

Chocolate is My Friend: Let’s just jump straight into the questions.

I noticed you did away with your elegant high-heeled boots. You’re well known for your infamous Super Bowl commercial when you strutted down the street, being admired, experiencing cat calls, telling the world to “Go buy a bag!” It was considered a pretty bold advertisement at the time.

What happened to that confidence and what happened to your heels? Are your lashes the next to go?

Green: Women wear sneakers.

Chocolate is My Friend: Yeah, I suppose they do. I imagine like me, your closet is full of stilettos of several styles and trainers for all sorts of occasions. Women are known for their ability to collect oodles of shoes and negotiation skills to shop, shop, shop!

Green: I’m actually moving away from that identity and the reinforcement of stereotypes. Makes for a healthier well-being.

Chocolate is My Friend: Boy, do I hear you! When I get PMS cravings, I like to sooth myself with a bite or two of chocolate. I like to think I’m replacing my lost iron with peanut M&Ms. It’s a win-win nutritionally and mentally. I’m sure you can relate?

Green: Like I said, I’m moving away from any identity, for the sake of inclusion.

Chocolate is My Friend: Ok, hmm, let’s see.

Uh, what other campaigns can we expect to see in the future? Anything along the lines of combating the over-consumption of sugar or fat?

Green: Moderation. We try our best to put choices back into the hands of the consumer. We’re only a reflection of that demand. Where there is demand, we take part with our due diligence to sell. In 2021 we made over $40 billion in revenue, representing over 80 countries.

Chocolate is My Friend: Wow! How about improving the fair trade of cocoa?

Green: Yes, actually, you can check out our Modern Slavery Act Statement here.

Chocolate is My Friend: That’s great! I see a lot of principles and policies on your website, maybe in the future we’ll get to see some video testimonials in action about the work that is done and the people performing it.

Next question. How about improving literacy? When it comes to inclusivity, can anyone who reads the “m” as a “w” as an “e” or “3” share the same chocolate candy experience as someone who recognizes the “m” on the candy?

Green: The culinary experience is unique to every individual. That’s why the “m” is so interchangeable and the reason you can flip it over to an unmarked side. It was our plan all along. Our branding symbolizes support for everyone in every circumstance, our evolving ethos, and our ever-developing core values and ethical practices since inception in 1941.

Part of our mission is to find fluidity in solidarity and solidarity in fluidity.

Consumers, whether established or new should expect alterations to fit the needs and will of consumers, our influence on them, their influence back on us, and our ability to influence them even more.

Look at our competitors. Some only go as far as tasting some half-effort display of light refraction in the sky. Everybody knows that rainbows are complete circles and that circles have no end.

No, not us. We have the Milky Way to illustrate how far we go above and beyond. Take Pluto for example, which has been kicked out and invited back into a community of established criteria several times.

We want to be a reflection of that, a reflection of the ever-changing foundation in established truth no matter how it’s perceived. We strive to celebrate perception. When perception is at odds with perception, we strive to celebrate that too.

That’s how we maintain consistency and sustainability.

Chocolate is My Friend: That’s an interesting viewpoint. Isn’t Skittles part of your parent company though?

Green: Exactly.

Chocolate is My Friend: Hmmm. I guess there is one particular bar that was also way ahead of its time. People forget there were actually four musketeers, not three.

That’s an incredibly innovative way of thinking forward. Reminds me of this quote from a wise man, a chocholatier, who said “You should never, never doubt something that no one is sure of.”

Green: For sure. We believe and standby our commitment in how everyone gets the same individual experience.

Every experience is different you see, whilst also being the same. We want that message clearly communicated to our consumers so no one is left out and those who feel left out come back into the circle that contains us all.

Chocolate is My Friend: Ahh. Okay, so everyone is technically inside the circle to begin with. It’s just a matter of time, space, and mind?

Green: Absolutely. It’s an important time for everyone to reflect upon history, the present time, and our future. That’s because we’ve taken our time to prepare for the future by selectively curating the present and cancelling out the past. Which in turn saves other people’s time.

Chocolate is My Friend: Oh my goodness! That craze when green M&M’s were thought to be an aphrodisiac!? Are you saying it wasn’t a conspiracy but instead an inside deal to help us understand green as the symbol of fertility, which is the symbol of going green to save our planet, and now saving our time!?

Green: Like a circle coming around to meet itself, we like to think of ourselves as getting a return on our investment as we get a return on our investment.

Chocolate is My Friend: Oh I get that and I’m sure our audience understands that same sentiment too.

I bet that includes a tactic to keep prices fair and distribute high quality products along that same notion. All the best companies do. I remember Forbes magazine referring to your parent company as the third-largest privately held in the United States.

There must be so much we don’t know. The fact that no one outside the family has ever seen the “m” applied during manufacturing lets me know how tried and true the company is when it comes to the commitment to keeping secrets in order to help humanity.

For example, when I picked up a bag of M&Ms for these blog photos this morning, the clerk offered me a discounted package. It was a leftover from the Christmas batch, I mean, ahem, the holiday sales product distribution timeline.

The experience left me wondering how the selection process goes to show me a foretelling desire for discounted products that were hidden behind the counter, rather than keeping it on display.

Reflection, reflection.

Hold on a second. Is the package of M&M’s expired?

Phew. No expiration date at all.

Well that takes the difficulty of using my brain out of the equation. You’ve really empowered me as a consumer! I can’t even rely on counting back to a specific date among the unified holiday celebration much less the year.

Wow, what a clever marketing strategy. I feel like you know me better than myself!

Spending more attention to the details of holiday advertisement rather than inking an important product safety expiration date?

Genius.

You saved me not only money, but time and any wasted thoughts or reservations that I had about you, Green.

Green: We stand by our product.

Chocolate is My Friend: Tell us all something we don’t know, like how the idea for the M&M candy came about.

Green: The M&M was born out of a candy coating chocolate method that allowed soldiers serving in the Spanish Civil War to enjoy chocolate in warmer climates without it melting.

Chocolate is My Friend: I see, does the association with war mean that war is supported by your company?

Green: Well if you look at it that way, we all support war in some shape or form.

Chocolate is My Friend: Interesting. I suppose so, I mean we do pay taxes. Thank you for sharing, I was unaware of those bits of history and how it all relates.

Green: Well when you believe in something, you have to explore the moderate and the extreme to find compatibility with your beliefs and aspirations, only then can one begin to accommodate everyone else’s even if they are in conflict with one another. We’re all in the same boat after all.

Chocolate is My Friend: True, even if some of us are navigating different waters, we’re all in the same boat.

Can you tell us about the move to change the labeling from “King Size” to “Share Size?” The past speaks loudly and changing the label doesn’t necessarily change the historical context or the experience. What would you say to that?

Green: I’m not sure I follow.

Chocolate is My Friend: Take the game of chess for instance. It’s the king who hides. He hides behind what begins as this incredible kingdom when it comes under attack. Albeit divided by class and skill and the only thing that unites them all in the end is whittled down to collective grievance. From his throne he watches all the peasants’ lives crumble. Not even the animals are spared!

Doesn’t the term “share” end up inferring to the same thing?

Green: Great question. In the spirit of sharing I’d say no.

Chocolate is My Friend: Okay. Why not change the labeling to “Queen Size” and celebrate the strength of the under represented, the under appreciated, the humble dominance of the one who offers to take the last hit before the big fall?

Green: Yes, but when it comes to the game of chess, as you pointed out, the queen has moves that give her clear advantage over anyone else on the board. Advantage is privilege. We’re not about privilege, we’re about inclusivity. For everyone. Equally.

Chocolate is My Friend: I see, I guess I should ask about something else from a different angle. What’s the strategy behind assuming the choice and action of the consumer by imposing the morality of self-sacrifice in giving up M&M’s piece by piece, rations to whom are assumed to be deserving friends and family, rather than indulge in what some might argue to be the sweet, yet satisfying lonely experience of one?

Say, if I ask someone to pick me up a “Share Size” does it infer the obligation to do just that? What if everyone around me hates chocolate?

Please tell us what I should do in that instance?

Green: Share of course, because how in the world could anyone ever hate chocolate?

Chocolate is My Friend: Yeah, I certainly can’t relate to that. Which means nobody else does either. How could hating chocolate even be a choice?

Green: It’s certainly a work in progress. [Green shakes her head in despair].

Chocolate is My Friend: Besides, if someone truly hated chocolate, buying the “Share Size” would mean I could end up having the package all to myself because their choice would over rule my choice wouldn’t it?

Hmmmm…

Green: Exactly. As long as someone out there is buy– I mean, enjoying our chocolate, that’s all that ultimately matters in the end.

Chocolate is My Friend: Speaking of choices. With the “Design Your Own” M&M personalization option, is there any design, logo, message that would not be in line with company values and missions? Can you think of anything that would not be accepted as a submission?

Green: I suppose you will have to find out.

Chocolate is My Friend: Let’s move on to M&M color distribution. In a quest for equality and fair representation, what are the color proportions inside each bag?

Green: You could always count them.

Chocolate is My Friend: The diversity proportion in my bag draws some interesting conclusions. Perhaps you can come back at another time and we could talk about them in more detail.

This leads me to the last question.

We’ve seen many color changes over the years. I remember when there was yellow, brown, tan, orange, green, and red. Little did I know that while having a slumber party as a child, where we spent all day and night dialing 1-800-FUN-COLOR over and over, we were voting to replace a mainstay color, the one that represented me the most, instead of adding one.

My push was “4” on the telephone for purple by the way, which lost the voting contest to blue. I really wanted the next M&M color to be purple but I didn’t think that my color would ever be discontinued, much less replaced. Do you think we’ll ever see a resurgence?

Green: Well that sort of question says more about you than it does about me now doesn’t it?

Perhaps we should learn to abandon all our identities, not only for the sake of inclusion but because we wouldn’t be abandoning anything if we abandon everything together.

Chocolate is My Friend: Ok, well, this concludes the interview.

Thank you for taking the time to answer the questions from our audience.

I hope you have a wonderful day!

Green: It’s certainly been a wonderful discussion. I’d like to thank you, Chocolate is My…

[Crunch].

(End of Interview)

Tell me about your fictional character interview and thoughts in the comments below!